I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
