He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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