So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
