Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
tell me about the fingering
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