I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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