i always forget guys have bellybuttons
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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