when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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