I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize