yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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