I think im going to throw up on grandma
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
