is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I think your dad took our porno
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
