Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
