GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
