I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
