I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize