Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
