i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
