I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
