I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
