Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
