Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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