all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
