Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I will be naked everywhere
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
