it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize