You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
