i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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