The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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