Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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