Who did Billy Mays play for?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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