So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
