Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
It's shark week go big or go home
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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