Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
