so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
