Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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