You just made me feel so damn special
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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