the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
