absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
