he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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