hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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