Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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