Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
There's always time for handjobs
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
