Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
