You're so nebulous sometimes
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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