yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
