I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Randomize
