we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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