Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i came on her dog
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
