We're like a lot better than the average bears
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
