why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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