come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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